Hanging Rock Re-Make

“How many miles are you feeling like this morning?” Oh, I don’t know. Maybe 7 or 8? I started with a 2 liter pack of water frozen solid. It was melted by mile two. Because those first two miles. Were straight up the side of a mountain. 800 stairs. Or maybe 5,000. My legs will … Continue reading Hanging Rock Re-Make

Accommodation Workout

Sooo…there’s a “ring of fire…” just hovering over southwest Virginia? And…we’re not…we don’t want to talk about end times yet…? I mean, it is summer, in Virginia, so I guess that makes sense... And I thought I’d escaped public education. The world of 504’s and IEPs. I was wrong. Because my plan was 5pm Full … Continue reading Accommodation Workout

Natural Bear Repellant

Disclaimer: In case you’ve found this post by searching for “natural bear repellant” on the internet. I’m sorry. This is not that. This is satire. Well, actually it’s my life. But my life is basically satire. So… So, it’s freakishly beautiful in Virginia today. Cool. Clear. Lovely. And because every run I went on last … Continue reading Natural Bear Repellant

Birth Certificate or Certificate of Birth

Went to get my Real ID today. Because I wanna be prepared. When Gilead comes. And they try to make me work the colonies. I need to be able to get to Mexico. “Do you have your birth certificate?” Yes. “Ohhhh. You didn’t get a signature on this?” On…my birth certificate? “Yes. You should have … Continue reading Birth Certificate or Certificate of Birth

Grand Teton National Park

The entire Western United States is gaslighting us about wildlife. Marmots. Grizzlies. Moose. They’re not real. I’m convinced that the one tiny moose we saw was just a big deer. That Rogue and Fall Risk called a moose. To shut me up. We woke up at 4am yesterday morning. And left the house in time … Continue reading Grand Teton National Park

Yellowstone Lower Loop

Yellowstone. This is the most accurate poster I’ve ever seen. We flew across the country. And drove across Montana. And halfway across Idaho. To see Yellowstone. And after 4800 hours of traveling. We rolled into the Air bnb. Where Host wanted to chat. For hours. While showing us all of the features of the unit. … Continue reading Yellowstone Lower Loop

Where Have All The Water Balloons Gone?

I would like to leave now, please. “No. You’re going to just sit in this for a bit.” Because Rogue enjoys the absurd. A little too much. And Fall Risk is impervious to it. What had happened was we were having pre-movie dinner. And two women walked in. And one of them waved. In our … Continue reading Where Have All The Water Balloons Gone?