It wasn’t fine. I wasn’t fine, y’all. I don’t vomit easily. Nausea isn’t a sensation I often experience. Two children and not an ounce of morning sickness. Tequila. Whiskey. Moonshine. Copious amounts. I can barely make it down off the mountain. But no hangover. Y’all. I eat expired foods ALL OF THE TIME. I’m not … Continue reading This Is Why I’m Like This
strength training
Caution: Leg Day
Tina Fey has been training my co-workers. On how to manage me when she leaves. You walk in and she’s crying. What do you do? Give her food. She’s smiling. Looks happy. What do you do? Give her food. She is existing anywhere near you. What do you do? Give her food. We get this, … Continue reading Caution: Leg Day
Waiting on My Christmas Crew
Day Three of Thanksgiving Break. And I still haven’t found my way onto a mountain. I also haven’t left my bed before 8am. I haven’t gone for a single run. I feel ok about all of this. I did, however, find my way to PlayFITStayFIT Wednesday. Because Fall Risk made me go. And Skratch reminded … Continue reading Waiting on My Christmas Crew
Friday Night Fitness
I slept in this morning. Felt amazing. My body needed it, too. On account of the gym. Last night. A Friday night. I don’t go to the gym on a Friday night. I’ve got better things to do on a Friday night. (The new Mandalorian episodes are released on Fridays. And I don’t wanna hear … Continue reading Friday Night Fitness
Catch Me If You Can
So, we’ve skipped straight over fall right into frozen tundra. And I spent a lot of time walking in and out of well-heated buildings today. In and out of the frozen tundra. I didn’t want to go to the gym. I wanted to go home. To sweatpants. And blankets. And basketball. And so very much … Continue reading Catch Me If You Can
Twenty Six Degrees
26 degrees. That’s the temperature it will be at 6am tomorrow. When I’m starting out on the Catawba Run Around. It will be 26 degrees. Here. Where I live. Not even on a mountain. Which means it will probably be 16 degrees on North Mountain. Which is already the worst place in the world. I … Continue reading Twenty Six Degrees
Return to PFSF
I just spent 28 minutes arguing with my body. About whether or not we had to shower before work. I mean, we showered after the gym last night. Let’s sleep in. But that was only a cursory shower. We should actually clean all the places. Why? Who are we trying to impress at work? And … Continue reading Return to PFSF
We Call Him J-Vicious For A Reason
I just ate half a rotisserie chicken. And a jar of pickle juice. In my car. On my way home from the gym. One of my co-workers suggested I need more protein in my diet. As he judged me for the bags of potato chips I was shoving into my mouth. What’s more protein than … Continue reading We Call Him J-Vicious For A Reason
End Of A Birth Celebration Week
It's Friday, y'all. My birthday week is winding down. There will be no fitness for me today. Because yesterday So what's happening here is this. NO ONE except Liz and I showed up for Arm Day yesterday. And because J-Vicious knows that partner workouts are the worst things ever... This is me holding a low … Continue reading End Of A Birth Celebration Week
Leg Day Tattoo
I just asked a stranger to go to the store for me. I sat in my car. In the Dollar General parking lot. Rolled down my window. And asked the dude walking past me to go into the store for me. Because this. That is the imprint of a 55 pound weight. Because when you're … Continue reading Leg Day Tattoo
Shine My Way 