Category: Adventures
-
This Is Why Women Live Longer
How many men does it take to plug in a fan… So what’s happening here…is Captain Obvious was having a hot flash. Or something. And started whining about needing a fan. One specific fan. There are two other fans in the gym. But he needed this one specific fan that has to be plugged into…
-
Incomplete Impromptu Road Trip
Sometimes you just need a road trip. Had happy hour at work. Again. Yesterday. (These folks love to celebrate shit.) So I sat there. With my beer. Watching them all talk. And laugh. And reminisce. About all the times that happened when I didn’t work there. IT guy talked to me. “You’re Sunshine.” I am…that’s…
-
A Much Needed Return To Christmas Mountain
“When I was younger, my friends and I used to do an Invincible Week.” Well, that sounds like something I need to do. “We stopped after our last event when they had to send search and rescue for us.” Yes. This speaks to me. In all fairness, it’s speaking to me a little less this…
-
More Airport Adventures
24 hours. That’s how long I’ve been wearing a bra. And pants. Twenty four solid nonstop continuous hours of bra. And pants wearing. I did the math. Including time change calculations and shit. That’s how upsetting this situation is. I did time change math. At 3:30am. Yesterday. Utah time. I got an alert on my…
-
Utah National Park Tour: Zion
Final day of our five day five park tour. And it’s raining. Like constant rain. Just all damn day. Raining. And I don’t know about y’all. But driving into a canyon during an all day rainstorm feels…sketchy. Like, perhaps we shouldn’t be provoking the universe like that? But we’re nothing if not the sort of…
-
Utah National Park Tour: Bryce Canyon
Air bnb dude: “Have you ever seen the Milky Way?” My dumbass responding excitedly: Yes! Air bnb dude: *looking at me skeptically* Fall Risk: *staring at me confused* My dumbass justifying my response: At my old house. I could see all kinds of shit. And then I threw in something about light pollution to make…
-
Utah National Park Tour: Capitol Reef
Day three of no breakfast. Or dinner. I clearly owe Fall Risk’s co-worker an apology. We headed out this morning. Fueled with the knowledge that we were heading towards Giffords House Pies. Under the belief that. If we didn’t get there before 11:30am. We’d miss out on the pies. That would sell out by then.…
-
Utah National Park Tour: Canyonlands
“My co-worker told me that when she came out here, they only ate like one meal a day.” Well, that’s the dumbest shit I ever heard. … So the issue. When you send two introverts out into the wild. On their own. Is that once they’ve done whatever thing they were assigned to do. They…
-
Utah National Park Tour: Arches
I just googled how to open a bottle without a bottle opener. The search returned 13 options. The one option it didn’t return. Which was the only option that actually worked. Was wandering around camp asking people for a bottle opener. This particular anecdote is representative. Highly representative. Of how our trip is going so…
-
Mt. Elbert
About two years ago, someone thought we should sign up for Leadville Heavy Half. I want to say that someone was Rogue. It’s the kind of dumbass idea she would come up with. I just know it wasn’t me. I also know that I had no idea what the Leadville Heavy Half was. When I…